Msg Base:  AREA 5  - ASK FATHER            CIN ECHO   AMDG
  Msg No: 275.  Tue  3-31-92  6:05  (NO KILL)  (MAILED)
    From: Father Mateo
      To: Deryl Oldag
 Subject: Marriage Counseling

+-
| I have a friend that is having some marital problems. She has only been
| aware of their problems for about a week.  Her spouse is not willing to
| seek counseling and is not willing to salvage their marriage at all.  They
| have been married for only 2 1/2 years.  She's willing to do anything it
| takes to get her marriage back on track but she has no support from her
| husband.  What are responsibilities as a married Catholic?  I know this is
| a very broad question, but any help would be much appreciated.  She is
| very confused and has talked to a priest but has not recieved an answer to
| the above question.  She wants very much to fulfill her obligations as a
| Catholic and worries that if the worst happens, such as a divorce, she will
|  not be recognized by the Church.
+-[DO=>FM]
 
Dear Deryl,
 
Your friend cannot make her husband do what he obstinately  refuses
to do.  But she should through prayer and persuasion try to bring
him to seek with her the help they need as a married couple.
 
Their mutual responsibility is to do everything to save the  marriage
if possible. I can suggest two sorts of help:
 
1) Marriage counseling:  The counselor should certainly be a
Catholic. The parish will have a list of available Catholic
counselors in the couple's area.
 
2) The Rediscovery Weekend:  this is an intensive marriage
encounter.
 
These and other helps can be found  easily by getting in touch with
one or both of these agencies in Houston:
 
        1) Family Counseling Services:  Miss Marion Bell, admin.
           3520 Montrose Blvd., Houston 77006. Tel. 713-526-4611
 
        2) Family Life Office: Mister and Mrs. Wallace Honeywell
           St. Dominic Center, 2401 East Holcombe Blvd. Houston, 77021
           Tel. 713-741-8710
 
It is very important for your friend to realize, that if a divorce
happens, there is no stigma upon her as a Catholic.  She must even
increase her use of the Sacraments and strive for a deeper prayer
life.  One or both of the above-mentioned agencies  will be helpful
in suggesting  and sponsoring forms of support--emotional, spiritual,
and social.
 
The agencies can also direct her to priests who are experienced in
working with people who have marriage difficulties or who are divorced.
 
Please assure your friend of my prayers.  I ask all our conference 
readers for their prayers, too.
 
                                Sincerely in Christ,
 
                                Father Mateo